A Personal Entry

Today, I went past an old neighborhood where my partner used to live (and where I spent most of my time during the first year or so of high school) -- the apartment that inspired Sang and Murray's apartment in The Boys of the Gallery -- and the building she lived in has been torn down.

It was kind of an emotional moment for me. Not only did we have so many memories there, but I have so many memories tied there for my characters. Of all of the characters in BotG, Sang and Murray were my favorites to write together, and they seemed the most tangibly real, even through their outlandish design. And of course, writing the scenes that happened in that house -- all of the former victims of a pedophile photographer coming together to stop him from getting away with murder, but not being able to escape the past they all shared -- were so tangible to me just because of the setting. When I read over those scenes, I can see the unique way light comes through those dusty windows, I can hear the way conversations muffle in those walls, and I can feel the rain leaking through the balcony awning. Most of all, I feel Dash's hesitation and uncertainty -- the loneliness he feels as he considers leaving them in the middle of the night.

I'm so sad it's gone now, but reading those scenes again will bring it back as strongly as if I were walking up those steep, narrow stairs and down that dark hallway. Maybe it will give me an excuse to begin revising after so long, to finally make the scenes before those in that place match the message I had hoped to send with the rest of the work.